BIG money for Will Smith, Madonna, and Kimora...June 27th, 2008

"Big Willie" Weekend Expected for Will Smith, BIG touring bucks expected for Madonna, and Big Money expected to change hands at both Death Row Records and between Russell and Kimora....

This week, while premium gas in my neighborhood is at $4.55 (while, if I lived in Saudi Arabia, a gallon of state-subsidized gas would be .68!!!), the Libertarian party presidential candidate Bob Barr (who, while he has absolutely NO chance of winning, is on the ballot in 30 states and trying to get on in 20 more) is supposedly going to pull a "Ralph Nader" and take votes away from Republican candidate John McCain (like Nader did to Al Gore in 2000). Nader, who reared his ugly septuagenarian head and made headlines this week in his "criticism" of Barack Obama by stating that the next president of the United States Senator from Illinois is not willing to attack "The White Power Structure" and that he is trying to "Talk White", reminded us all exactly why Washington politics needs to CHANGE. While I don't know if its MORE offensive and racially incendiary for a Caucasian to accuse an African-American of being "less black" because of the level of his political success (which has evaded Nader!), for his supposed unwillingness to go up against "the White Power Structure" (which Nader himself is a card-carrying member of AND against whom Nader himself has never REALLY rallied against!) and for his command of the King's English (which Nader himself, and every other educated person, uses!), I DO know that these "race-baiting" remarks are offensive regardless of the source; which brings us to Don Imus, whose most recent comments on race make him less "shock jock" and more "sheer jerk". Comic George Carlin passed away, leaving his unique comedic legacy by cajoling us with the "Seven words you can never say on television" (those words, by the way, are: shit, piss,fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits- and apparently you STILL can't say them on television, but you CAN say them in an online blog!). Bill Gates leaves his legacy as chairman of Microsoft , transitioning out of a day-to-day role in the company to spend more time on his global health and education work at the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, and North Korea tries to leave behind its legacy as a member of George Bush's "Axis of Evil" by agreeing to dismantle their nuclear weapons program in exchange for a relaxation of U.S economic sanctions against them. Anyway, here is what is stuck in my craw as this issue of THE REAL RE-Edit goes to press this week:




THE 2008 BET AWARDS, RE-dux
The BET awards came and went this week, seemingly without ANY fanfare, really. I could recall every tedious moment of the show FOR YOU, but I'll just RE-Edit it...

You can see the editted version of the pre-show here

Obviously, I'm either getting too old to understand youth culture, or I'm just a "Saditty Negro" because the Red Carpet/Pre-show made me happy that I didn't watch it live, but instead was able to use the fast-forward button on my DVR. I say this because in my view the pre-show was two hours of Rocsi, Terence, and company eschewing subject/verb agreement and putting the word "at" behind every preposition they could find. Young hearthrobs Soulja Boy (who was a tacky explosion of "questionable" Gucci), Jamaican beef patty Sean Kingston, not-so Young Jeezy, and not-so Pretty Ricky yucked it up for the camera, and V.I.C, Soulja Boy, BUN B, DJ UNK, Polo Da Don & Jermaine Dupri made me feel like I was the 50 year-old dirty old man in the club who covers his ears because the music is too loud when they performed the remix to V.I.C.'s song "Get Silly"- which is EXACTLY what they proceeded to do...
On the grown and sexy side, Gabrielle Union looked pretty in Celine, Alicia Keys looked passable in a poufy dress (although the Sergio Rossi shoes saved the whole look!) and Lil Kim- hiding under a horrible lace-front wig, two tons of foundation, and a pair of ridiculous false eyelashes- looked completely DRAG! Host Terence looked sharp in his Dolce & Gabbana getup and, surprisingly, Rocsi looked relatively pretty in her pre-show dress that she was SURE to let us know was FENDI (even though it was from their SPRING 2007 line!- ahem!).
As for the actual show, it was pretty uninspiring as well, even as the stars THAT ACTUALLY SHOWED UP tried to pump excitement into the laborious production (conspicuous by their absence were Beyonce, Jay-Z, Janet Jackson, Missy Elliot, T.I., Mary J. Blige, Mariah Carey, and anyone else who ACTUALLY HAD A HIT this year!!!). Usher, Ne-Yo, and Chris Brown all looked/sounded alike, Puffy pulled a "Dame Dash" move and unabashedly hawked Ciroc Vodka both during the telecast at the podium and at the televised "After-Party", host DL Hughley was remarkably UNfunny, and Kanye West added a little more credence to his reputation as "the international asshole" when he declared HIMSELF "one of the Kings of this Game", following up that proclamation with "so my opinion counts"...sigh...

There WERE a few highpoints, though. Alicia Keys' performance, while not her best, proved to be among the best, as she carted out old girl groups SWV, En Vogue, and TLC during her set. Perhaps the BEST performance of the night went to Al Green (YES, AL GREEN!) who, after accepting the BET Lifetime Acheivement Award, went on to give a performance of "Love and Happiness" and "Let's Stay Together" that garnered the only true standing ovation of the night.

Aaaaaand SCENE...


QUESTIONS FOR THE ZEITGEIST- JUNE 27TH, 2008


1- She is a MONSTER on the runway, an editorial BEAST, and one of the most beautiful women in the world, but...After Foxy Brown was banished to Riker's Island for HER repeated assaults as a result of HER temper, is it a double standard that Naomi Campbell- who basically perpetrated the same acts (most recently by expectorating on a British Airways pilot) is only given community service AGAIN? I LOVE La Campbell, however with this being her THIRD time facing the same charges that Fox Boogie aka Inga Marchand faced, shouldn't the "three strikes" rule apply?

2- How successful will The Million DJ march (slated for August 28-30th) be?


3- After being implicated as a member of a cocaine distribution drug cartel by one of its members AND being pulled over for DUI in one week, should Young Jeezy just go somewhere and sit down for a minute?


4- Speaking of someone not having a good week...First officials rejected her request to carry the Russian flag at the Beijing Olympics opening ceremony this summer, then she is unceremoniously ousted from Wimbledon in the second round by fellow Russian (and 154th seeded!) Alla Kudryavtseva, 6-2, 6-4. Given how her luck is going lately, shouldn't Maria Sharapova go have a seat (and perhaps, a cocktail) next to Young Jeezy?
4a- Incidentally, how CUTE is her dog 'Dolce' in Sharapova's 2007 commercial for Canon's Powershot digital camera?



5- Speaking of being irresistable in commercials...Shouldn't this kid win a Screen Actor's Guild award or something- not just for his clear enunciation of the word "antidisestablishmentarianism", but also for his knowing smirk in this Dairy Queen commercial?

6- While we're talking about cute kids...Apparently, the courts think that Ming Lee and Aoki Lee, children of hip hop mogul Russell Simmons and queen of conspicuous consumption "Fabulosity" Kimora Lee, are worth big money! On the eve of their divorce, court papers filed state that Lee is looking for Simmons is to pay $20,000 a month in child support for EACH of their children. Can Kimora bring these little women up on a mere $480,000 a year?



7- Fresh off of his knockout punch outside of a LA club a couple of weeks ago, Suge Knight was dealt another blow this week, when his Death Row Record label- including some unreleased Tupac tracks- was auctioned off for $24 million. Can a SECOND attempt at bankruptcy and mortgage foreclosure be far behind?




8- Everyone knows that in the eyes of THE REAL RE-Edit, she is a GODDESS...How EXCITED are we for the premiere of Wendy Williams' television talk show July 14th on Fox?
8a- We LOVE Detroit newsman Charles Pugh! Exactly how much DELIGHT is he getting in asking Wendy "THE Question" during their interview ?





9- The Los Angeles- based concert promotion company 'Live Nation' has reported that Madonna had sold more than one million tickets -- over 90 percent of those available -- for her 42-date global "Sticky & Sweet" tour, which kicks off in Cardiff, Wales on August 23. At almost $200 a ticket, hasn't Live Nation made all their money back on the $120 million they've paid "Madge" for her entertainment, recording, tour, merchandise, and endorsements rights? At $170 a ticket for Jay-Z's "Heart of the City" tour with Mary J. Blige, will they make back the $150 million they recently paid HIM?





10-Tony winner and WASPish ice queen/sex siren Bebe Neuwirth will play Morticia in the upcoming Broadway musical "The Addams Family" in the 2009-2010 season. The role of Gomez has been offered to . . . Nathan Lane. The former Dr. Lilith Crane (of NBC's "Cheers" and "Frazier" fame) and the former Max Bialystock (one-half of one of Broadway's most beloved duos in "The Producers"). How perfect is THAT? Even though NBC has brought 'Lipstick Jungle' back for a second season, shouldn't Brooke Shields be Neuwirth's understudy?

11- Okay, who DOESN"T get a kick out of newcomer Katy Perry relishing in the fact that she may have bisexual tendencies (and that she LIKES it!) in her new song, "I Kissed A Girl"?



12- First his movie, 'Independence Day' takes no prisoners at the box office when it opened on July 2, 1996 to the tune of $50.2 million. Then 'Men In Black' opens on the July 4th weekend in 1997, grossing $51.1 million. Its sequel, 'Men In Black II', opens that same weekend in 2002 and grosses $54.1 million. Now his latest, the flawed superhero 'Hancock', is certain to kick box office ass when it opens on July 2nd. Shouldn't it be common knowledge by now that the July 4th movie weekend belongs to Will Smith?


THE FASHIONISTA FILES...

1- Some laughed at what Lauryn Hill wore onstage at the historic Fugees reunion on the BET awards back in 2005. Does anyone else see any similarity between her onstage effect that night (three years ago!) and Stefano Pilati's current collection for YSL?


(FYI...THE REAL RE-Edit gave Lauryn props waaaay back in 2005...check it out here)


2- Christian Bale sports hand made-to-measure suits whenever he plays Batman's alter-ago, Bruce Wayne, in the new Batman movie. He had the choice of custom made Armani single-breasted or three-button suits, single-breasted tuxedos and black wool coats... Can Toby Maguire as Peter Parker top THAT?


3- The Joneses are keeping UP...Has Kelis' fashion sense finally rubbed off on her husband Nas (shown in this month's COMPLEX magazine in JACKET BY ORTHODOX, WINDBREAKER BY NIKE, BELT BY ORIGINALFAKE JEANS BY DIOR HOMME, SNEAKERS BY DSQUARED2, and SUNGLASSES BY MARC JACOBS )



4- Speaking of keeping up with the Joneses...With the supposed worldwide food shortage attributable to increased consumption from oil-rich Arab states as well as from China, is that same competitive spirit sweeping the fashion industry? Reports abound of affluent Chinese women with yen to spare snapping up high-end and one-of-a-kind pieces coincide with the death of Yves Saint Laurent- and some say the death of couture itself. China, however, is fast emerging as a viable market for the couture client. Should true fashionistas learn the language, move to Hong Kong, Shenzhen, Macau or Wuhan in order to cut those customers off at the past?




5- Even as we fawn over the beautiful images that Steven Meisel gave us of the most stunning black women on the planet in JULY's Vogue Italia, did anybody happen to see the cover and 18-page spread of the JUNE edition of the same magazine, where Meisel (and stylist Andrew Richardson) "reinvent" the fashion industry's QUEEN of reinvention, Linda Evangelista as "The Duchess"?


5a- Does anyone else notice the similarity in feeling between this Linda Evanglista photo (also in the June 2008 "The Duchess" editorial) and the Naomi Campbell photo in July's edition?




















6- Versace does Lamborghini...The Italian fashion house of Versace will design the interior of the new Murcielago LP640 Roadster, according to news circulating during Milan's fashion week for men. The cars, whose interiors will be fitted with black and white leather, will be made on demand so the number to be produced has yet to be determined, a Lamborghini spokeswoman said. Now.. if people aren't buying high-end SUV's because of gas prices, who do they think is going to buy THIS?



7- Never mind separation of church and state, what about church and STYLE? At the intersection of religion and fashion (although some people's religion IS fashion), comes false reports that the current Pope has raised the hemline of his traditional garb to highlight his red Prada loafers. Although it has recently come to light that they are NOT, in fact, Prada (according to Vatican sources, the Pope's shoes are made by a cobbler from Novara named Adriano Stefanelli and that Papal shoe repairs are carried out by Peruvian shoemaker Antonio Arellano ), would it even be appropriate for Pope Benedict to don said label? If 'The Devil Wears Prada', doesn't that mean The Pope...shouldn't?



ACCESS THESE ACCESSORIES!!!


-The following are MY sartorial obsessions this summer...

1- Alber Elbaz does it AGAIN!!! Isn't the Lanvin men's accessories line for Summer 2008 FLY as hell?



























2- While we're on accessories, how HOT is this nylon and leather Salavatore Ferragamo duffle?









3- If your bag MUST match your shoes, isn't Dior Homme's new Fall/Winter 2008 patent leather high-top (paired with the weekender and/or messenger bag) the flyest way to get in and out of Charles de Gaulle or Hartsfield International in STYLE?


4- If your goal is getting through the airport without being bothered by the paparazzi, shouldn't these Jeremy Scott "Gold Toolbox" sunglasses be perched on your face?

5- Even though I WASTED $$$ on his signature cologne (after wearing it on two occasions, I'm OVER it!), how HOT is Tom Ford's latest eyewear campaign?




FLASHBACK...
Long before he was a Man in Black, a Bad Boy, Jada's husband, or a Prince of Bel Air, Will Smith was celebrating the July 4th weekend with backyard barbeques and family reunions, bringing middle-class humor to the gritty hip hop scene. Remember...DJ Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince's "Summertime"?

Whoopi has legs, Lil Wayne has loot, and Tyra has the CW on lockdown!- June 20th, 2008

On my mind THIS week:
"THE 5,000" DANCE IS ABOUT 5,000 YEARS OLD (!), R. Kelly should pray 5,000 times a day, Hermes and Yohji want a little more than $5,000 for their bag, and Lil Wayne sells, ummm, a little more than 5,000 copies of Tha Carter III...


In Case You Missed It...

Looks like The Grim Reaper reared his ugly head this week. Death, and the avoidance of it, appeared to be the theme, as actress/dancer Cyd Charisse ("Singing in the Rain") is "eighty-sixed" at age 86 (as was "Meet The Press" heavyweight politico Tim Russert- at age 58), as British Columbia is rocked by the news of five severed human feet (all RIGHT feet, mind you!) having been found along the Canadian province's Pacific coast in the past 11 months, as confirmed bachelor Mario Lopez is trying to prevent the inevitable death of his career by "dropping trou " and recreating photo shoots of past sex symbol icons Burt Reynolds (in his 1972 Cosmopolitan magazine shoot), Christopher Atkins (in his 80's "Blue Lagoon" effect), and Marky Mark (in his 90's Calvin Klein underwear ad) in this week's PEOPLE magazine, which is naming him their "Sexiest Bachelor", and hot tranny mess Duanna Johnson narrowly escaped death after being brutalized by a Memphis police officer while waiting to be booked for suspected prostitution- no doubt Ms. Johnson will get her LIFE when she collects the $1.3 million dollars she's suing the Memphis police department for...
You can see a report and the entire disgusting video here...

So, if you are still alive even after having to contend with a nationwide "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes" scare, here is what is going on in the solipsistic bubble above my head THIS week...



1- The "new" dance out of Harlem seems to be "the 5,000", which is done by, among other things, falling on your back to the ground while extending one leg, like so...




When will the "general population" come to realize that this, like so many other dances and trends, was started (and perfected) in the underground gay ballroom scene YEARS ago?








2- Is it even possible for Tyson Beckford to ever take a bad picture?

3- According to various news sources, at least five jurors in the R. Kelly child pornography case were convinced that it was indeed him on "The Tape", but felt that "there wasn't enough evidence to prosecute". What more did you need, for him to re-enact the "money shot"??






4- Who knew that Whoopi Goldberg had legs? (Shown here hosting last week's Tony Awards in a dress by Project Runway winner Christian Siriano).





5- After being busted trying to "cop" crack cocaine on New York's Lower East Side , Oscar winner Tatum O'Neal told the arresting cops she was researching a role. Exactly which movie is she slated to star in where she plays an ailing, Oscar-winning child star who, after developing a FIERCE heroin habit, loses her kids to her tennis-star husband and writes a bestseller chronicling her (supposed) various orgies with other Hollywood starlets, her dealings with an abusive father, and other shocking allegations before becoming a certified crackhead?

6- Who else is feeling Solange's new song (and video!), 'I Decided'?


7- Sorry T.I., but...Isn't Lil Wayne (who gagged the entertainment world this week by moving 1,005,500 copies of his newest CD, Tha Carter III, thus becoming the first CD of 2008 to go platinum in its first week), the NEW King of Hip Hop?





THE FASHIONISTA FILES

1-Are you a Lanvin-lover in need of some dungarees? If you can wait until November, get thee to Barney's New York and Bergdorf Goodman! Alber Elbaz does Lanvin denim with Swede label Acne jeans. The line (a dress, a tuxedo jacket, a belted trench, blouson, and of course JEANS) will range from $550 to $650, while coats will run $1,200 to $1,500. Of particular note is a chic jean jacket that Elbaz has retailored for the Lanvin proportion. Jewelry and handbags are expected to be priced north of $1,500- My question is this: Isn't this supposed to be a "diffusion" line? Aren't these price points a little too close to ACTUAL Lanvin?


2- Good Girl Gone RAD?
Gucci and (Elle creative director) Joe Zee recently hosted an extraordinary summer soiree and private dinner honoring Rihanna (who appeared on the magazine's June cover). She's establishing herself as a fashion plate (did anyone catch her opening the Dsquared fashion show last season?), she's well on her way to becoming a gay icon (ask any same-gender-loving individual), and her latest single is entitled "Take A Bow". Isn't this Bajan-born "It girl" making good on her goal to become "the black Madonna"?



3-Need more Valentino?
For my best friend, Phoenix b., (who is currently in Paris through the remainder of the month), something else to check out...For those of us who were heartbroken at Mr. Garavani's retirement this year, a little respite:


Valentino: Themes and Variations opens in Paris today and runs until September 21 at Les Arts Décoratifs. The exhibit features 225 high-fashion creations by the Roman couturier curated by Pamela Golbin. Will Alessandra Facchinetti , who took over for Mr. Valentino (and who, rumor has it, was NOT Valentino's first choice to succeed him), go to the exhibit with her sketchpad?


5- How SMART was it for former cocktail waitress Sarah Larson to parlay her "relationship" with George Clooney into being the new face of Christian Audigier (of "Ed Hardy" fame)?








6- How HOT was Project Runway season 3 alum Michael Knight's dress (modelled by 'Dancing With the Stars alum Karrina Smirnoff) on Bravo's A-List Awards last week?


7- "It's yellow, it's ugly, it doesn't go with anything but it could save your life." Karl Lagerfeld promotes road safety in France with this public service announcement. Will this vest (albeit with interlocking 'C's) show up on his runway in the spring?


Maybe its the SHOE(s)...

6- With her shoes flying off the shelves at retailers like Marshall's, is Jessica Simpson smarter (and more STYLISH) than we give her credit for?

7- Speaking of shoes, how HOT is the new Jimmy Choo Fall/Winter campaign featuring Angela Lindvall?







FnFYI (Fashion news For Your Information)...


1- Blahnik honored...An entire city will recognize the British cobbler's contribution to fashion. The Rodeo Drive Committee and the City of Beverly Hills will bestow the 12th-annual Rodeo Drive Walk of Style Award to Manolo Blahnik at an awards ceremony on September 25th for his contributions to fashion and entertainment. (Past honorees include James Galanos, Gianni and Donatella Versace (2007), Salvatore Ferragamo, Edith Head, James Acheson and Milena Canonero (2006), Herb Ritts and Mario Testino (2005), Tom Ford and Giorgio Armani).


2- Still on the waitlist for your Birkin? For a casual alternative, consider The "Yohji" bag, designed by Yohji Yamamoto and created by Hermes.The bag is available made-to-order in select Hermes stores, starting at $6,200 for 35 centimeters and up to $7,100 USD for 41 centimeters...

3-Thanks to Cartier, now you can satisfy your fashion appetite while helping to make sure that other people eat. The French jeweller has launched its 'How far would you go for Love?' campaign. My pick from The "Love" collection is the "Love Charity" bracelet, a set of intertwined 18 carat white and pink gold rings on a silk cord. Stylish and somewhat understated, a portion of each sale of the bracelet will be donated to Action Against Hunger, an international, non-governmental, non-religious, non-profit organization that tackles hunger in 43 countries worldwide and seeks to alleviate malnutrition amongst children. Now, THAT'S Love! (currently sold for $995.00 with$200.00 from each purchase going to charity)




COVER WARS


1- Who missed Tyra on the cover of last week's New York Times magazine?

1a- Speaking of the "Bankable" one, aren't we ALL going to be sucked in for an extra hour on the CW Network on Wednesdays, when 'America's Next Top Model' is followed by 'Stylista'?



2- How predictable (and uninspiring!) was it for Vogue to put Sarah Jessica Parker on their cover to coincide with the 'Sex and The City' fanaticism?

2a- How INSPIRING was the "wedding dress" segment in the "Sex and The City" movie?

3- Its the second week in June...Aren't we ALL waiting with bated breath for the Vogue Italia July issue (which is to feature all-black models cover to cover) to come out on next Thursday?


3a- The cover (which features Liya Kebede, Sessilee Lopez, Jourdan Dunn and Naomi Campbell), is BEAUTIFUL, but...has anyone seen the pictures Steven Meisel (who photographed the entire 100 pages) took of plus-sized diva Toccara Jones?


FLASHBACK...
Before she had dreams of becoming "the black material girl", this Bermudan chick was begging the DJ to turn the music up...Remember...Rihanna's "Pon de Replay"?